BACKPACKERS' VOCABULARY
Credit to Backpacker.com and Urban Dictionary.
Cajoleries
(n.) Candy brought on a family hike to bribe children to keep going without complaint. Can be used on adults as well.
Ex. “I never would have gotten my 5-year-old up that hill without the cajoleries I packed.”
Outdoorgasm
(n.) The giddy, euphoric feeling of topping out a peak or pass, reaching a secluded alpine lake, or spotting some unlikely wildlife on the trail.
Ex: “That sunset last night gave me the best outdoorgasm of my life!”
Rockblock
(v.) To be stymied on a hike by a section of scrambling too difficult or scary to do.
Ex: “I tried to hike Pedernal but I got rockblocked by that last climbing move.”
Frinebble
(n.) A tiny rock, grain of sand, or piece of debris in your sock causing extreme discomfort or chafing. Remove any frinebbles immediately to prevent hot spots and blisters.
Ex: “You go on without me—I’ve got to stop and remove this frinebble from my left Altra Lone Peak.”
Crag
(n.) A big fucking rock.
Ex. “Woah, that’s a crag”
Snack Bandit
(n.) An unprepared hiker who doesn’t bring enough food, instead choosing to mooch off their partners.
Ex: “Better pack a few extra bars if you’re hiking with Maria—she’s a real snack bandit.”
Appretentsive
(adj.) Describes the anxious feeling one experiences when every campsite appears full at the end of the day, and the next one isn’t for a few miles up the trail.
Ex. “I know you’re tired and hangry, but no need to get appretentsive; if we hurry, we can claim the last spot across the lake.”
Déjà Views
(n.) The more boring scenery on the second half of an out-and-back hike, where you’re retreading an area you’ve just been through.
Ex: “The hike out was nice, but the déjà views kind of made me wish I had found a loop hike instead.”
Grain-Counter
(n.) An ultralighter so obsessive about reducing weight that grams are too big a unit of measure. (A grain is equal to .065 gram.)
Ex: “Susan is such a grain-counter, she files her toenails before every hike.”
Michelob Ultralighter
(n.) A backpacker who is normally fanatic about saving weight, except when it comes to adult beverages.
Note: Applies no matter which brand of cheap beer they prefer.
Ex: “Charlie, the Michelob Ultralighter of the group, packed a tarp, a toothbrush with the handle cut off, and a sixer of Old Style.”
Phantom Spice
(n.) The subtle yet distinct flavor carried from one meal to the next when a hiker fails to thoroughly wash out their camp dish.
Ex: “I’m getting some phantom curry spice in my oatmeal this morning, and I can’t say I hate it.”